Truth Media: Plastic

I remember when it became common to see people walking around with plastic water bottles in the mid 1990’s. I didn’t understand it, there was a water bubbler every ten fucking metres, however it appeared carrying plastic water bottles around had become fashionable (so of course I missed that memo). This, on top of our love of covering all types of foods in plastic, meant virtually nobody could avoid being exposed to this petroleum derivative in some form or another.

Human nature.

We are drinking from it, eating out of it, covering our food in it and plastic is the basis for most of the sex toys we use as well. We are simply the worst as a species so obviously it was only later we stopped and asked ourselves, is this healthy for me? And then much later, is it healthy for our babies and children?

This Truth media exposé will put to bed the myths, isolate the dangers and put you in an informed position to make healthy decisions for you and your family. Unlike earlier Truth Media articles there wasn’t sufficient time to research appropriate source material or include links to peer reviewed studies on the subject. I did however briefly scan a Choice article, something from the Dailymail and also got some really good information from the person sitting beside me who knows all sorts of stuff sourced entirely from Facebook. So ‘informed’ may be a poor choice of words but at least this won’t be long.

Becky aint going to be

happy about this.

The answer as to whether plastic has any negative health related consequences on humans is a categorical “No”. But in some circumstances, “Yes”, but far less categorically. Also that “Yes” is sort of trailed off, the person raises an eyebrow, shrugs and follows up with, “Under certain conditions and depending on a lot of circumstances”. Both the Dailymail and Choice agreed that plastic likely isn’t the issue, it’s the additives used in construction of certain types of plastics that are the concern. The sole voice of dissent was my Facebook using colleague as her niece, Becky, had posted a picture about plastic being deadly.

Now that is pretty fucked up in my opinion and obviously Becky isn’t happy with the situation either. But without a Chemistry Degree (or a Degree in Applied Science which, despite assertions to the contrary, isn’t the equivalent of a Bachelor of Arts) how would the common man or lady on the street know the difference between plastics? It’s not like they are named or anything.

Applied Scientist.

Sciencing.

Well, yes, they are named. Choice even has put together a table that separates out the respective plastic groups. However, it is really long and a deep into the article so anyone would be forgiven for not getting that far. On the other hand, Dailymail had a far more succinct commentary and then put up pictures of scantily clad people. My colleague, resolute in her stance, just reiterated that it makes you sick. Then like 15 minutes later, when I had almost forgotten having the conversation, told me it also causes cancer. So that isn’t good either. Or probably at all accurate.

So assuming you are a common man or woman on the street, possibly struggling your way through an Applied Science Degree, here are a list of ways you can ensure you live a healthier life in a world of plastic:

• Don’t have children. They take up so much time, vomit on you repeatedly and at some point you will get shit on your hands. In addition, almost everything we do in the world causes them to catch cancer or get sick in some way.

• 

  Thanks, Becky.

  I won't be.

  Before buying something made out of plastic, and assuming you were going to use it in some way connected with food, or connected with sexual gratification, or a combination, make sure you check the label and crosscheck against that Choice table
• When you have finished using plastic, for fuck’s sake do not re-use it. Burn it. The black smoke is a symbolic representation of a healthy cleansing
• Alternatively, just add Becky on Facebook and let her guide you through life

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